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Suggested Reading






Silently Seduced: When Parents Make Their Children Partners

Ken Adams

Understanding covert incest.


Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy, Revised and Updated

David D. Burns

Learn how your faulty thinking causes you to feel sad, angry, hopeless…


Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child

John Bradshaw

A book that helps you understand how the different stages of your childhood influence your psychological health.


First Things First

Stephen R. Covey, A. Roger Merrill, Rebecca R. Merrill

Learn how to better organize your time and procrastinate less.


Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ

Daniel Goleman


The Worry Trap: How to Free Yourself from Worry and Anxiety Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

Chad LeJeune

Learn how your faulty thinking causes you to feel sad, angry, hopeless…


The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships

Harriet Lerner

Excellent book for people who over-function in relationships and who stuff anger.


The Emotional Incest Syndrome: What to Do When a Parent’s Love Rules Your Life

Dr. Patricia Love


When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

Matthew McKay, Peter D. Rogers, Ph.D., Judith McKay


The Energy of Money: A Spiritual Guide to Financial and Personal Fulfillment

Maria Nemeth

Your relationship with money is a metaphor for your relationship with life.


Suze Orman’s Financial Guidebook: Put the 9 Steps to Work

Suze Orman



Women’s Issues:


Bountiful Women: Large Women’s Secrets for Living the Life They Desire

Carmen Renee Berry


Women Who Love Too Much

Robin Norwood

When being in love means being in pain…



Men’s Issues:


When He’s Married to Mom: How to Help Mother-Enmeshed Men Open Their Hearts to True Love and Commitment

Kenneth Adams, Alexander Morgan

For both the man and his partner.


I Don’t Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression

Terrence Real

Fantastic book for men to understand the male form of depression–irritability and anger.









Bountiful Women: Large Women’s Secrets for Living the Life They Desire

Carmen Renee Berry


Don’t Call It Love: Recovery from Sexual Addiction

Patrick Carnes

This is one of two books I always recommend to addicts for themselves and co-addicts to understand the disease.


Sexual Anorexia: Overcoming Sexual Self-Hatred

Patrick Carnes, Ph.D., Joseph Moriarity


Lonely All the Time: Recognizing, Understanding, and Overcoming Sex Addiction, for Addicts and Co-dependents

Dr. Gregory Crow, Dr. Ralph Earle, Kevin Osborn

This is the 2nd book I recommend to addicts and co-addicts.



For Female Addicts:


The Betrayal Bond: Breaking Free of Exploitative Relationships

Patrick Carnes


No Stones: Women Redeemed from Sexual Shame

Marnie Ferree


Women, Sex, and Addiction: A Search for Love and Power

Charlotte S. Kasl

Great first book for female addicts and their co-addicts.


Facing Love Addiction: Giving Yourself the Power to Change the Way You Love

Pia Mellody, Andrea Wells Miller, J. Keith Miller


Women Who Love Too Much

Robin Norwood

When being in love is being in pain.


Love Sick: One Woman’s Journey through Sexual Addiction

Sue William Silverman





Cybersex Unhooked: A Workbook for Breaking Free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behavior

David L. Delmonico, Elizabeth Griffin and Joseph Moriarity


Cybersex Exposed: Simple Fantasy or Obsession?

Jennifer Schneider, Robert Weiss



For Gay Addicts:


Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men

Robert Weiss



Partners of Sex Addicts:


Mending a Shattered Heart: A Guide for Partners of Sex Addicts

Stephanie Carnes

So much of what partners need to know about various topics.


Disclosing Secrets: When, to Whom, and How Much to Reveal

M. Deborah Corley, Jennifer Schneider

A new book by the experts in Sex Addiction Codependency treatment. A must buy!


Back from Betrayal: Recovering from His Affairs

Jennifer Schneider, M.D.

This book is the original Sex Addiction Codepedency book by a recognized expert in her field.


Sex, Lies, and Forgiveness, Third Edition

Jennifer Schneider, Burt Schneider





Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself

Melody Beattie

This is the cornerstone book for codependency, in my opinion.


Women Who Love Too Much

Robin Norwood

When being in love is being in pain.







Healthy Dating:


Easy Does It Dating Guide: For People in Recovery

Mary Faulkner


A Fine Romance: The Passage of Courtship from Meeting to Marriage

Judith Sills, Ph.D.

Absolutely the best book describing the interpersonal issues people deal with during the dating, going steady and decision to marry or have a lifetime commitment.


Guerrilla Dating Tactics: Strategies, Tips, and Secrets for Finding Romance

Sharyn Wolf

Some suggestions are far out, but the overall tone of the book is very good at helping shy folks to take the steps needed to meet their partner.







Imago and Other Relationship Books:


Loving Your Partner without Losing Your Self

Martha Baldwin Beveridge, Harville Hendrix, Helen Hunt


Open Hearts: Renewing Relationships with Recovery, Romance and Reality

Patrick Carnes, Debra Laaser, Mark Laaser


Kids Pick Up on Everything

David Code


The Divorce Remedy: The Proven 7-Step Program for Saving Your Marriage

Michele Weiner Davis


Not “Just Friends”: Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity after Infidelity

Shirley P. Glass, Jean Coppock Staehali


Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: And How You Can Make Yours Last

John Gottman


Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples, 20th Anniversary Edition

Harville Hendrix, Ph.D.


Getting the Love You Want Workbook: The New Couples’ Study Guide

Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., Helen Hunt, Ph.D.


Keeping the Love You Find: A Personal Guide

Harville Hendrix, Ph.D.


Receiving Love: Transform Your Relationship by Letting Yourself Be Loved

Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., Helen Hunt, Ph.D.


How to Improve Your Marriage without Talking About It

Patricia Love, Ed.D., Steven Stosny, Ph.D.


The Truth About Love: The Highs, the Lows, and How You Can Make It Last Forever

Patricia Love


When Anger Hurts Your Relationship: 10 Simple Solutions for Couples Who Fight

Kim Paleg, Matthew McKay


How Can I Get Through to You?: Closing the Intimacy Gap Between Men and Women

Terrence Real


The Monogamy Myth: A Personal Handbook for Recovering from Affairs

Peggy Vaughan



Gay Relationships/Issues:


Ten Smart Things Gay Men Can Do to Improve Their Lives

Joe Kort



Healthy Sexuality:


For Yourself: The Fulfillment of Female Sexuality

Lonnie Barbach

Still one of the best books for helping women discover their sexuality.


For Each Other: Sharing Sexual Intimacy

Lonnie Barbach


The Couple’s Guide to Intimacy: How Sexual Reintegration Therapy Can Help Your Relationship Heal

Bill and Ginger Bercaw


The Sex-Starved Marriage: A Couple’s Guide to Boosting Their Marriage Libido

Michele Weiner Davis


Reclaiming Desire: 4 Keys to Finding Your Lost Libido

Andrew Goldstein, Marianne Brandon


Erotic Intelligence: Igniting Hot, Healthy Sex While in Recovery from Sexual Addiction

Alexandria Katehakis


Hot Monogamy: Essential Steps to More Passionate, Intimate Lovemaking

Patricia Love, Jo Robinson

This is not a how-to book–no explicit instructions–just the best book written for helping couples whose relationship has gotten dull.


Rekindling Desire: A Step-by-Step Program to Help Low-Sex and No-Sex Marriages

Barry McCarthy

Fantastic, compassionate book. Very helpful.


Erotic Mind: Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfillment

Jack Morin


Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence

Esther Perel

**Some chapters may be too triggering for Sex Addicts. A great book, but not for Sex Addicts.**


Sex Smart: How Your Childhood Shaped Your Sexual Life and What to Do About It

Aline Zoldbrod, Ph.D.





Kids Pick Up on Everything

David Code


Giving the Love that Heals

Harville Hendrix, Ph.D.


Love or Addiction?: The Power and Peril of Teen Sex and Romance

Brenda Schaeffer


Parenting from the Inside Out

Daniel Siegel, Mary Hartzell





Other Addictions


Behind the 8-Ball: A Recovery Guide for the Families of Gamblers

Linda Berman, Mary-Ellen Siegal


When Money Is the Drug: The Compulsion for Credit, Cash, and Chronic Debt

Donna Boundy


Chained to the Desk: A Guidebook for Workaholics, Their Partners and Children, and the Clinicians Who Treat Them

Bryan Robinson







The Language of Letting Go

Melody Beattie


Strength in the Storm: Creating Calm in Difficult Times

Eknath Easwaran


Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal, and Delight in Our Busy Lives

Wayne Muller


The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth

M. Scott Peck


A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose

Eckhart Tolle


Meditations for Recovery Zone: Inspirational Meditations for All People in Recover and Their Families

Jeffrey Walker, Patrick Carnes


Essential Spirituality: The 7 Central Practices to Awaken Heart and Mind

Roger Walsh

A great book for people who are trying to learn about spirituality.




Individuals of all cultural backgrounds / sexual orientations welcome.


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"A ship in harbor is safe — but that is not what ships are built for."

-J.A. Shedd